Reflections on life as of late...

Dear Friends and Family
Well, it’s been about a month since I wrote and things are starting to settle in some, so I thought I’d take a moment to write. It’s been quite an adjustment coming here, as was expected.

When I arrived here at Ft Hood, TX I immediately received yet 2 more vaccines...one of which was the Flu Mist and yes…it really does give you the flat out flu…I’m not impress w/this so-called vaccine – I think I stood a better shot without it. Anyway, the fall out of that was that the day I met my unit, I was feverish and feeling completely crummy. Were it not for my overwhelming enthusiasm, I think it might have been a disaster.

In the last 3 weeks, I’ve been desperately trying to catch up with trainings, online and off, meeting folks, preaching, leading worship (now that I have my voice back), meeting my unit, FINDING my unit amongst all the others of this 3-Brigade taskforce we’re a part of, trying to heal, doing PT, passing a ‘pop’ PT test (!), counseling soldiers, and team building with the other chaplains in the task force…oh, and I went to Schuyler, NE to do my regional ordination interview…I think that about catches the breadth…

So, its been busy, but with the constant help of the Lord (I kept finding myself in the right places at the right time or saying the right thing to the right person, etc) and a lot of support from my Team back in CO – I’ve managed to stay sane, sort out some of my role and gain some footing in this strange environment.

I’ve found myself reflecting on 2 things lately – what is ‘normal’ and where is ‘home’ (I know, here we are again). Normal for me now means being on-call 24-7, but so far not being called at ridiculous hours. Normal is eating with 50+ other soldiers in a DFAC (dining facility) with some REALLY high fat foods (working on getting around this). Normal, is getting a random call from a soldier in crisis and finding time to meet them and just spend some time pouring into their hearts as they tell their tale. Normal is a daily thirst for God’s word and finding my quiet time is the most critical point of my day. Normal, is calling my friends every few days, trying to remember the last time I talked to them – each day has felt like several, so I can end up calling more frequently than I realize(or what used to be ‘normal’). Normal is wearing the same thing every day, just with different under garments. Normal is living in a one room cell that I think would give a Monk a run for his money. Normal is expecting the Lord to give me what I need when I need it and not a moment before. Normal is looking for an embracing the mercy and grace that surround me as I get to know these people. Normal is looking for opportunities to love people whether it’s by getting them a snack, listening to them or just smiling and give them a decent human being greeting.

I had an epiphany this summer on the subject of home, that I am continuing to live into/test its validity. This summer I was at Ft Jackson. It was a wonderful time of training and fellowship with other new chaplains. However, when I left there, I reported to Training Center McCrady. This was a very difficult place to be in even though it was only for a week. The hardest part was not the accommodations or food or training, but in the know that this was not the place I was supposed to be. Knowing that everything I was doing I would have to do again when I met up with my unit. That place felt useless and pointless in the scheme of my overall mission. That place could not feel like home no matter what I did. And this was the impression I walked away with – this place more than any other in my adult life, was not and could not be home. This hit me on the drive back to CO once I was finally released on a 10 day pass. I often feel at home wherever I am. No matter what the living conditions, I have usually been able to find a sense of equilibrium and thereby home. Not so there. This really helped me to discover that home is not a place. It is not the stuff you have with you, not entirely the people surrounding you. Home is being in the place you know you belong. Home is knowing you are doing and being what you need to do and be and find the space to do it. Interesting…
On a final note, I’ve been reflecting on my ordination interview a few days ago. I had such a good time with them. It was a little stressful, but the gift of not having time to freak out and read everything you can get your hands on to cram, is that you have the chance to sit back a little and watch God come through. It was a delight to sit with the panel and discuss a range of topics together. I never thought such a thing would ever happen to me. What a life I have!

Prayer requests:
- A sense of peace for all of us as we transfer over in the next week or so
- Quick and good communications with the States re-established
- A solid sense of ‘the job’ upon arrival
- A good reestablishment of a healthy life rhythm
- Good use of the time between ‘now and there’